Bill Carpenter
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Bill's Blog

September 02nd, 2024

9/2/2024

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THREE WORKSHOPS OF SELF-DISCOVERY TO HELP PEOPLE AND ORGANIZATIONS FULFILL THEIR PURPOSE AND POTENTIAL

​Workshop #1: Focus is on the individual – needs, values, beliefs.
Workshop #2: Focus is on business and personal relationships - friends, and partners.
Workshop #3: Focus is on groups and organizations – creating a culture that aligns the needs, values and beliefs of the group/organization with those of its members.
I have spent many years developing and refining a system to help people awaken from their programming (ego and culture) to achieve their purpose and potential. Much of our programming happens without our conscious involvement. The result is that we often think and act out of habit. Without awareness, we can become mindless drones of the collective. When we identify with ego and culture, we believe they define us. We tend to view the world through the lens of our programming which can block or distort our perception of reality. The truth is, that we are infinitely more than our programming. This programming is like a mask we wear or an actor or an actress who immerses themselves so much in a role they play, that they become that character.
The ego is a mind-created identity. Like snowflakes and fingerprints, each ego is unique. The possibilities are limitless depending on the influences and circumstances in each person’s life. Like a software program running on a computer, it is brought to life by the computer, but it is not the computer. Software programs are intentionally created for a specific purpose. Although some of our learning is intentional, for example, structured education, most of our programming is evolutionary and random. Our programming is important, it is how we learn, but it should not define us. The media and the internet bombard us with information, much of which is misleading or untrue. Society teaches us that to be happy we must have and do things. That it is OK to go into debt to be satisfied. Our way of life depends on debt. It is how those in positions of power control us. We are called human beings for a reason. We are not called human havings or human doings. We must first be before we can do and we must do before we can have, not the reverse as our society would have us believe. Eventually, we must pay the piper.
Workshop #1. The first of my three workshops targets the individual. It is also the foundation for the other two workshops. We must each awaken and connect with ourselves before we can connect meaningfully with others. The essence of this exercise is to have each person examine their programming. This is achieved by taking them through a guided process to identify the ten or twelve most important things in their lives (their life values) in order of priority. Next, they look at the needs and desires that arise from these values and the places they look to satisfy them (work, family, relationships, church, clubs etc.). They also determine the extent to which their needs and desires are met and whether their life is consistent with their freely held values. They identify obstacles and value conflicts and positive actions to improve their life.
Workshop #2. The second program is directed towards personal and business relationships. Participants must have completed the first program and be willing to share their results. The objective is to create a prioritized set of partnership/group values. Prioritizing the values is critical. The new set of shared values is often different from the individual results. Complete agreement is unlikely since everyone is different. It is more important to get willing consent. The sharing and discussion leading up to consensus are as or more important than the result. Based on their value-driven needs and desires, the participants discuss their expectations from the relationship. If there are significant differences in values or expectations, they will become apparent during the exercise. This could be a red flag for possible problems in the relationship.
Workshop #3. The third workshop addresses organizational culture. The participants must also have completed the work in the first workshop and be willing to share their results with a small group of colleagues. Before initiating this program, organizations are encouraged to conduct an anonymous survey of their people to determine the organization's current state of health. This survey addresses how people feel about the organization, whether they feel connected and committed to it, whether their expectations are being met and their views on the existing culture. Based on the survey results, leadership may decide to initiate the workshop.
Commitment from people is more readily given when they are meaningfully engaged in the direction and culture of the organization. They also tend to be more passionate when they have some control over what they do. Someone in every group must make the final decisions. Doing so, however, without knowing people's needs, expectations and values and engaging them when appropriate is not wise.
This workshop consists of two parts. One part involves engaging the employees/members in a one-day session to determine their values, needs and expectations from the organization and their views and recommendations on its culture. They are broken into small groups of no more than eight where they share their individual worksheet results. Each group summarizes their collective results and recommendations which they share with the other groups and submit to the organization’s leaders. The other part of the workshop is for leaders/managers to give them a more detailed understanding of the program, how to evaluate the results, and how to implement change. 

WORKSHOP #1
AWAKENING FROM OUR PROGRAMMING
TO ACHIEVE OUR POTENTIAL​

​This four-hour workshop is designed to make people aware of their programming and
how it influences and controls their lives. It guides them through an exercise to identify
the ten most important things in their lives in order of priority (their life values). From this
list, they identify their needs, desires and expectations from life and where they look to
satisfy them. They evaluate the degree to which these needs, desires and expectations
are being met and identify actions for improvement. They also assess whether they are
living their life in a way consistent with and supportive of their freely held values. This
workshop has the potential to be a life-changing experience. It involves some
homework. There are no recipes or prescriptions for happiness or success. Each
person must choose their path and formula. The rewards can be substantial. I believe
three quotes sum up the essence of this workshop.
 “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in
having new eyes.” - Marcel Proust
 “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” -
Max Planck.
 “We do not see things as they are, we see them as how we are.” – Anais Nin

WORKSHOP #2
Creating Happy and Successful Relationships

Wouldn’t it be great if people knew each other better before engaging in a personal or business relationship? Both personal and business relationships need commitment and alignment between the partners for long-term success. A misalignment of needs, expectations, values, and ethics often leads to failure. Disengaging from a failed relationship can be emotionally and financially draining.
Commitment in any relationship comes from connection to the other partner or partners. Connection with self is a critically important step to connecting with others. It is difficult to have a strong relationship if any partner lacks this connection with self. If we know our needs, values, beliefs, and expectations and are well grounded, we have the basis upon which to connect with others. The stronger the connection between partners, the stronger the commitment. A chain is only as strong as its weakest link. Without a strong connection, the relationship will be shallow and superficial. The partners may be at different stages of emotional maturity in their life journey. Discovering these differences at an early stage can help avoid costly mistakes.
Studies show that 20% of small business partnerships fail during the first year and 50% don’t make it beyond 5 years. One major reason for this is attributable to partners with different needs, values, capabilities and work ethic. One legal study reported that between 40 and 50 percent of marriages in North America end in divorce. In California, it is as high as 60 percent. There are also many unhappy relationships where the partners stay together out of habit, for financial reasons or for the children. Some of the reasons offered for these high divorce rates, include marrying too young, for money, or due to pregnancy or insecurity. I believe that the main reason marriages fail is that the partners do not know each other. When the romance or good chemistry wears off, they may discover that the real person is not who they thought they were. Without a strong connection at a deep level, these differences cause division often ending in divorce.
 
Participants in this program must have completed the work in Workshop #1 and be willing to share it with partners or potential partners. The intent is to create a consensual set of prioritized values for the relationship. Expectations based on needs and desires are also shared. The process of sharing values and expectations is as important as the result. Significant differences in these areas could be a red flag for the relationship. This workshop takes about 4 hours. If combined with workshop #1 it is 8 hours. These workshops can be conducted live or via Zoom and can be conducted in one to two-hour sessions.

WORKSHOP #3
CREATING ORGANIZATIONAL CULTURES FOR SUCCESS AND ONGOING VIABILITY
​

One of the most significant influences on the viability and success of any organization is its culture, yet many do not understand its creation and impact. Culture establishes the rules and norms of behaviour that members are expected to follow. In simple terms, it is the acceptable way of life for a group of people. In larger, more formal cultures, these rules are often written down, but in many groups, they are understood as the way members are expected to behave. The main problem with many cultures is that they are not intentionally created. They tend to evolve primarily at the whim of those holding power and control or those with the biggest egos. The result is that the culture may not be supportive of or consistent with many of its member’s needs, values and beliefs.
Many cultures resist change. Change can be disruptive. It is easier to maintain the status quo. Members who support the culture are often lionized for their loyalty. Leaders who have reached their position by supporting the culture tend to resist attempts to change for fear of losing power. Those who challenge the culture or suggest change are often demonized as troublemakers or whistle-blowers even though they intend to benefit the organization.
The workshop has four specific objectives:
  1. Identify member’s expectations to meet their needs and desires, assessing whether they are being met and recommending actions for improvement.
  2. Evaluate whether the organization’s culture is consistent with and supportive of its member’s values and adjust as deemed appropriate.
  3. Create new (or adjust existing) purpose, vision and mission statements that all people understand and are motivated to support.
  4. Establish a set of value statements or guiding principles for the organization.
There are two parts to the workshop. The first part is to give leaders/managers a detailed overview of the program, what to expect, how to evaluate the results and implement change. The second part engages the organization’s members in a day-long workshop to obtain their input on the four workshop objectives. The member’s workshop is broken into two sections. The first section (usually about an hour) explains the workshop's purpose, the leaders' commitment to change, and the anonymity of the collective feedback. It is also to introduce what to expect, clarify concerns, motivate members to get involved and assign homework for the second section of the workshop which is highly participatory. A two to three-day break separates the two sections to allow time to complete the homework.
Note: People cannot be forced to do the homework, but it will benefit them personally as much as the organization. It is a gift from the organization to help its members better understand themselves. Such a course, if taken personally, would be costly.
Leaders/managers may also take this second part of the workshop. However, it is recommended that they do so separately as their presence with the other members may influence or inhibit their input.
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HOW WE LEARN - The Formation of EGO and paradigms

7/5/2023

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​This is a simplified explanation of how we learn. The average human brain has between 90 and 100 billion neuron cells. Neurons are the brain’s messengers. Chemical and electrical signals are sent and received between neurons in the brain and throughout the nervous system to muscles and tissues. Whenever we experience a sensory input (sight, sound, taste, smell, touch, or any combination of these), a pathway is triggered between neurons in the brain. When the same sensory input is experienced again it reinforces the existing pathway. After many repetitions, the pathway becomes entrenched. The brain will default to an established pathway often with only a part of the original sensory input. This is how we learn. If this did not happen, we would continually have to relearn everything. People suffering from Alzheimer’s disease have a buildup of plaque in the brain that prevents these pathways from becoming established. As a result, the person has poor or no short-term memory.
Defaults on a computer work in a similar manner. When I was creating this document, the program often anticipated what I was going to say and completed the phrase for me. This is based on logic and previously established patterns. I can either accept this completion or change it to reflect what I intended. I must be aware or alert however to catch subtle differences. Although the defaults can save me time it is important that they accurately reflect my intentions. The word paradigm literally means pattern. In this sense, a paradigm is an entrenched thought pattern in the brain. Our ego is a mental construct of whom we think we are based on our established paradigms. The ego however is not the brain but merely a form of programming which could have evolved in an infinite number of ways depending on each person’s life experiences.
The ego is an illusory, temporary identity but is obsessed with its perceived reality and fights for its selfish survival often harming itself and others in the process. Every sensory input is different so we must be conscious enough to ensure that our perceptions are accurate. Stereotypes, biases, and prejudices are examples of established paradigms. We have a saying in society that “Practice Makes Perfect”. I believe it should be “Practice Makes Permanent”. We can learn something completely wrong and once established it can be difficult to change. Just ask any golfer. Because our ego evolves mainly without our conscious involvement we often behave or react out of habit rather than rational thought and behaviour. The solution is to become more aware of our thoughts and behaviour, transcend our ego, and connect with our true essence, the spirit or genie within.
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COMMITMENT COMES FROM CONNECTION

7/5/2023

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Commitment is a willingness to give your time and energy to something or someone in which you believe. It is a pledge or a promise to act. Commitment is an all-or-nothing quality; either you are committed or not. One can no more be partially committed than partially pregnant. It is a fundamental aspect of human nature that commitment comes from connection. If people do not feel connected to a cause, a group, or a mission, they will not commit to it.
 
So, the question is, “How do you build connections.” Communication is critical. The best gift you can give a person is your time and attention. People need to feel accepted and their input matters. Shared values, beliefs and activities help build connections. Many large companies go to great lengths to avoid talking to their customers. They want them to solve their problems online or by talking to a robot. Then they wonder why client turnover is high. Without connection, there is no commitment.
 
I believe that human connection is one of the main requirements for success. But to successfully connect with others we must first connect with ourselves. It is hard to love others if we do not love ourselves. Connection is a main thread that flows throughout my book. If we lack this connection, having a meaningful relationship with others is extremely difficult.
 
Sometimes to connect with others we must be willing to get out of our comfort zones. Some people intentionally go out of their comfort zones to connect while others retreat into their familiar shells. Two very good friends of mine; Albert Koopman and Lee Johnson wrote a book entitled How to Escape Your Comfort Zones. The following is a quote from the book.
 
Slipping into a comfort zone is a simple process. When we are comfortable, our activities and behaviour tend to take on familiar patterns. Patterns become habits; habits become routines; and before we know it, those routines become a rut. And the only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth of the excavation!
 
Staying in our comfort zones is an ego-driven response. In a world of accelerating change, defending the status quo can be fatal. We need to take risks, connect with others, and give to others as much as we have received. Our relationships must be symbiotic, not parasitic. We are all on this journey through life together. To quote Albert Einstein”
 
Strange is our situation here upon earth. Each of us comes for a short visit, not knowing why, yet sometimes seeming to a divine purpose. From the standpoint of daily life, however, there is one thing we do know: That we are here for the sake of others—above all for those upon whose smile and well-being our own happiness depends, for
the countless unknown souls with whose fate we are connected by a bond of sympathy. Many times a day, I realize how much my outer and inner life is built upon the labours of my fellow humans, both living and dead, and how earnestly I must exert myself in order to give in return as much as I have received and am still receiving.
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BEHAVIOUR HAS CONSEQUENCES

6/28/2023

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​(We Reap What We Sow)
Everything we do or fail to do has a consequence. If the consequence is unacceptable, we must change the behaviour. Unfortunately, this is not how many people behave. They expect the world to change to accommodate their behaviour. This expectation can start at a young age often fueled by permissive parents who fail to hold their children accountable for their dysfunctional or selfish behaviour. If their needs continue to be unmet, they may lash out at others and society in destructive ways. They adopt an attitude of entitlement and fail to accept accountability for their behaviour. This attitude is prevalent in our society including among our leaders. Einstein defined insanity as “Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”
We manifest this behaviour when we identify with our ego which sees itself as the center of the Universe. The ego is an illusion. It distorts the human perception of reality and can inflict pain and suffering on others and itself. The solution is to see the ego for what it is, transcend it and connect to our true self, the spirit or Genie Within. 

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The Destructive Power of Money and Human Greed

6/27/2023

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Money in modern society has become synonymous with power which leads to greed and corruption. Before money, people traded goods and services through a system of bartering. Later, the acceptance of metals such as copper, silver and gold made trading easier. The advent of coins negated the need to weigh these metals. For safekeeping, people would store gold and silver in the vaults of goldsmiths for which they would receive a receipt. This practice was the beginning of the banking system. The receipts were the precursor of paper currency and could be traded because they were backed by the precious metal on deposit.

When politicians took their countries from the gold standard, the paper money essentially became worthless except for the promise of the government to honour its value. This is referred to as fiat currency. In other words, it only has value because of a government decree. There is an inscription on every US bank note which reads: This note is legal tender for all debts public and private. Without a backing of substance, governments can print as much paper money as they wish thus devaluing the currency. The US dollar has lost 99% of its value since being taken off the gold standard. A $20 gold coin is now worth over $2,000 in fiat currency.

Money has become concentrated in the hands of fewer people thus giving them power over others by keeping them in debt. Our so-called democracy is defined by some as an economic dictatorship. “Wealth” comes from the English word “weal” which was a measure of a person’s abundance including friends, knowledge, wisdom, and health. Today wealth is reduced to money or things of monetary value. A whole new industry known as wealth management has been created to help manage money. The continuance of today’s madness requires people to increasingly go into debt. Without debt, the system could not be sustained. Our path as humans is clear. Stop going into debt. Stop buying into the illusion that your worth as a human being is dependent on what you have and do. This is an ego-driven response. The advent of cryptocurrencies is designed to put the power and control back in the hands of the people instead of governments and big businesses.
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